Growing up

Sometimes I envy kids, they have no cares... Fashion? who cares. Hygiene? when mom makes me. School? fun slightly time consuming acvtivity. Siblings? the best friends who are always there. Discipline? sitting on daddys lap talking about the coloring on the wall, maybe getting a spanking, then a hug. Morning? running into mom and dads bed and laying between them talking while daddy gets ready to go to work. Why couldn't I have appreciated it more!? I loved my childhood, I have the greatest parents, and my sister was my constant buddy. My little brothers were awesome. I would love to be 7 again for a day.

I never envy jr. high kids. That period of life is meant to get through, just an awkward time!

Highschool? it was so/so. I'm loved it during the time, it just kept getting better. But looking back, I don't think I would do it over. Except maybe hang out with the younger people sooner.

College? Is awesome, and horrible all at the same time. I love watching families grow. I was hanging out with my boyfriend and his family and its just fun when siblings grow up and interact. I have also noticed this with my family although my family is "young" none of the kids are married yet, and being far away Cam doesn't hang out with us very often. But as we all grow up we just have fun, everyone of us has a different sense of humor. We laugh. A lot. Every stage of life is good.. maybe not fun but its good. Although I would still take a day as a kid again.

And the one thing that is always true.

The future is as bright as the promises of God.

God of Thunder

Wake up Raina, there's a storm across the valley.
I live my life in Colorado its like none I've ever seen.
And every time a bolt of lightening strikes you can see across the field.
And the meadow lights up like a dream and the thunder rolls around the peaks from Denver to Pagosa springs.
And here we are so breathe it in open your eyes for God of thunder is writing on the skys.
Feel the power and taste the rain for all of nature echos your refrain to the God of thunder.

This is the beginning to a song by Danny Oertli. He had a very hard life, his first wife died suddenly after having their first son. And Raina came into his life after his first wife died.

This song just gives me goose bumps. Thunder storms are a beautiful testiment to God's power. Why do I still so often rely on my own power? He controls the sun and the moon. I can barely control my car, haha.

Lord, fight for me and I'll be still.

Put yo hood up

So I woke up this morning around 6:30 because the rain hitting our a/c is really loud, but I quickly fell back asleep... rain is amazing for that! Well when I woke up later to go to class the sound of gone so I kinda assumed the rain was gone so I throw some athletic pants on and a jacket (thankfully one with a hood) and headed out the door, well when I got outside I realized I was wrong, it was still raining, and while it wasn't POURING it was substantial. Well I have yet to invest in an umbrella and I don't have a rain jacket so I just put my hood up (enter soundtrack lol) and accepted the fact that I was going to get soaked and then have to sit in an a/c room for an hour and a half. To make things worse Manhattan, being the 25 ft above Tuttle as it is, has TERRIBLE drainage systems and so I practically swam to class.

On the up side I only had that one class today so now I have taken a shower changed in to comfy sweats and a tshirt and now I have the whole day to stay inside and study :) For being a rainy monday its not to bad... Hmmm, starbucks sounds good! It is time for their fall products to come out again... too bad I'm a poor college student :(

Football Therapy

I love football. I love the sound of big hits, the adrenaline rush of a huge throw and catch for a touchdown, the exhilaration of watching a awe-some play, the joy of cheering, and just everything about it. Its not calming but is just so much fun its therapeutic. I love it! Although only CPA won this weekend, I have watched four games so far and loved every single one. Plus the nice thing about football is you can do home work at the same time.

Thats all, I just wish football season was year round.

Only downside, watching football makes me hungry, think about it how often do you watch football and not snack on something?

Soft vs. Hard Tacos

I was getting tacos at the Derb for lunch today and I remembered the first time I went through a lunch line at Dominion. My parents had given me money for lunch and told me specifically to get soft tacos (I remembered them saying something about them being healthier) however either from the chaos of the line or my excitement/nervousness when it came time to choose I couldn't for the life of me remember which one I was suppose to get. So I hurriedly pointed to the one that looked the most like a taco to me, then went and sat down to get my nerves back in order. It was at this point that I realized I had gotten the wrong one. I was horrified, I had disobeyed such a simple rule, this was bad news!! I don't remember enjoying that taco... When I got in the car to go home I remember having to tell what I had done. But I don't remember if I got in trouble or not (I'm guessing they just laughed at how horrified I was lol) but that memory has stuck with me.

Gus

I made a new friend today, his name is Gus and he was a cute little guy. Had long legs, long torso, pretty strong, fan of the natural style, and clean shaven. He wasn't very talkative but he tagged along with me when I went to run errands today, he was just keeping me company. But then he started to get restless and I think he was getting a little carsick. This is when he throw himself from my moving car, it was very sad. RIP Gus, thanks for your short friendship. Gus was a grasshopper :)

I apologize

Dear Government,

Your Mail Man came and picked up my letter... which hopefully is somewhere on I-70 right now. I'm sorry for calling you a failure.

Audrianna

Another day another dollar

So yesterday I was walking to class and I found a dollar on the road... which is pretty much the equivalent to 20oz of pure class attentative, aka Code Red. Needless to say this made me pretty happy.

So I figured out that the lyrics stuck in my head came from the song Take Me With You... which I had listened alot of the night before. That makes alot more sense than just a random song stuck in my head :)

I'm very irritated with the mail system right now, I've had a letter sitting in the box waiting to go out since Friday... I'm coming to the conclusion that our mail person is on strike. I think I'm going to go take my letter to the post office. I should've done this awhile ago I guess but I just figured it would go out today... Guess not. Major fail government lol

For christmas I want sub woofers.. there is something about feeling the music that just can't be described.

Dark Blue

I woke up with the lyrics, my favourite colors blue I like to sing in the shower if you like I'd sing to you, stuck in my head which is weird because I haven't listened to that song in so long I can't even remember what the song is called lol. But I kinda combined it with Dark Blue in my head... Its weird how that happens...

I have been alone in a crowded room, many times... And I have been completely happy with only one person in the room, many times!!

Also it is true that you can forget everything just by being in someones arms... And you don't need music to dance.

Ok well I really need to get stuff done now... so peace out ya'll

Remembering...

Its 9/11. Wow years just fly by. Its been 8 years since I was out running with my dad (good memories, we would run on average 6 miles a day) When I saw a plane turn around I had never seen that before so I asked my dad and he said I don't know thats weird. Well when we got home we heard from my mom that planes had hit the twin towers, but we didn't know anything else. We didn't have a tv so everything we learned was from CNN.com. I really don't remember much else from that day, for some reason I always thought I was 10 on 9/11. Well that is a lie I was 12. haha.

RIP all involved. We still remember! And we are in the procress of attacking a country for no apparent reason. But thats another post for another day..

Homework avoidance :)

So I was listening to a song in the car while delivery today and I thought about something that happened to me recently...

I was at Six Flags with my family and we were waiting in line to buy tickets, it was about 3 in the afternoon and there were 3 lines open with about 15 people in each line, when the line to the right of us closed it made some (especially those in the front) very upset which is understandable it was hot, we were standing in the sun, most had youngish kids, and we had been waiting in line for about 20 or 30 minutes. So when this all happened one of the ladies up front said a nasty word to the lady closing her line, then went in stood in the back of our line like everyone else. About 5 minutes later the line to the left of us closed as well... STUPID IDEA SIX FLAGS!!!! Thankfully we were in the CORRECT non-closing line :) About 5 more minutes passed and I saw a short (he was shorter than me) extremely muscular (compensating maybe?) security guard walk up to a black middle-aged man with kids and confront him, needless to say I and the before mentioned lady, her husband and kids all turned and looked at this security guard like "WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT" well he got that egotistical look in his eye and said sir calm down I just want to ask you to step out of line and talk to me... Well needless to say this man (who had been standing in line for at least 30 minutes said no but I'll talk to you here... The security guard then said the check out lady reported someone saying a swear word in her line, and she pointed you out. The lady who was guilty spoke up right away, explained herself (needless to say cussing ALOT) to which the security guard said, without turning his back to the black guy, ok well ma'm we have alot of young kids around and we don't tolerate profanity so you need to calm down and refrain from cussing. Then he walked away...

This was eye opening, I had never really witnessed such blatant racial profiling before. And more than that everything in the guards actions screamed with prejudice. It made me furious, but also hopeful that the lady to blame spoke up, I don't even want to know what would have happened if she hadn't.

I pray that no matter what happens I will always be known for my love for all peoples, gender, race, domination, and culture.

"For this is how you shall know my disciples, by their love for one another" -Paraphrased from Jesus

Time...

Time just keeps ticking away...

I was looking at old pictures and it just hit me how much I miss my room! So many memories in that room, laying in bed and listening (usually falling asleep) to Daddy reading, waking up on Saturday mornings to the smell of Big Yellow's, the noise of younger siblings listening to Childrens Hour, or to Daddy BLASTING Brooklin Tabernacle Choir, or just to mom and dad talking in their room... or more often Daddy yelling for me too get up ;) I miss it! I haven't slept in MY bed for so long... And it will probably be when I get married that I finally get the joy of my own (or not my OWN but whatever) bed. My room was kinda boring, not every well decorated but it was mine I choose the paint color (blueish purple) I helped paint, and I changed the funiture arrangement monthly... I miss it! And I cant ever get it back...

Doesn't help that some BOY has slept in it since we moved

I like our new house, I've accepted it and I'm ok with it... but sometimes it hits me. And tears just stream down my face...

New track

Ok, so I stopped putting my diaries on here because basically I became obsessed with boys, and "fell in love" with about 3 none of whom I ever actually talked too lol. Ok so one of them I was good friends with but that definately never went anywhere and I am very thankful for that. So I guess I'm done with the diary idea...

Whats next? I don't know... but school is kicking my butt.

I wonder can you get sick just from stress? Cause I think you can cause I am. :/

I learned today that the phrase "rule of thumb" possibly came from Britain as an old rule which said that no man could beat his wife with a stick larger than his thumb. It makes me sad that they even had to make this rule and that this rule imply's that women were often beat by their husbands. I guess this makes me contemporary and new fangled but I don't think women should ever be beaten by their husbands (or vice versa) call me picky but I'm not going to marry someone who thinks they can beat... they can TRY to beat me at chess or checkers or darts though ;)